Skip to content

Category: Married Life

Love Is Not

I rolled out of bed sometime around 6:30 am. Like most of my generation and anyone who has ever gone to school Monday to Friday, I dread Mondays. I don’t professionally have a reason why. After all, I am the worst at psychology–I lived with my depression, Bi Polar II and probably anxiety untreated for decades because I just thought that’s how everybody do. So I go through my morning (I originally spelled it, “mourning,” and maybe that’s also true) routine, got my coffee, sat down, tooled about on the internet and then clocked in and went to work writing…

1 Comment

Things You Can Say to Cats

But generally not to fellow humans. At least. Usually you shouldn’t say them to strangers. I guess? Me: Watching the cats eat in the hallway, standing near Isis’ bowl, because the other cats tend to inhale their food then just push her out of the way and eat hers. Crinkles finishes and meanders over the dry food. Tinkles then finishes and meanders right over to Crinkle’s. Specifically, his butt. Face-plants herself in it. “Ahh, yes–” I say to Shawn. “Nothing says dessert quite like a face full of ass.” My husband: “I know when I finish supper, there’s nothing like…

Comments closed

The Angel and the Bear

Angels are often not after the business of bears you see. They are busy creatures going to and fro, flitting here and there and trumpeting things or announcing this and that. Very important people, angels are, and they never stop. Always so happy and always so go-get, swooping and singing and going about their day with no time for those below them or around them. Unfortunately, angels often did not have time for one another, either. One angel was a complete mess. Just a complete and total mess really. She was a little rounder than the other angels, and prone…

Comments closed

Our Love is a Hormonal Teenager – 14 years of Geekery

[et_pb_section admin_label=”section”] [et_pb_row admin_label=”row”] [et_pb_column type=”4_4″] [et_pb_text admin_label=”Text”] Today is the infamous day, in the year of oh lawd, 2017, when my husband, Shawn and I celebrate 8 years of official marriage. Actual we gotta piece of paper ‘n everything! marriage, as opposed to use getting together back in 2003 and from then on our simply referring to one another as husband and wife married. Our love is fourteen years old today and if it were a teenager in today’s world…Jesus, I would feel pretty torn up being a teen this year, also with the added befuddlement of hormones, brain development, and…

Comments closed

It’s like we’re coffee married!

[while I am coming out of the bathroom.] “You know…I wouldn’t be adverse to you making more coffee. Just puttin’ that out there. Y’know. Just in case.” [ Stop in mid step. Widen eyes. GASP. Flail my arms, ] ” OH MY GOD I just got the greatest idea ever…What IF…” [Pretends to lean on the wall and looks enthralled.] “WHAT if…WHAT IF….What if I made some more coffee?” “HOLY SHIT it’s like you can read my mind!” “I NO RITE???” makes more coffee. Life returns to usual morning routine.

Comments closed

First date snob.

Me: [Reads a screenshot of a twitter play-by-play of possibly the worst date in Starbucks history. Starts giggle snorting.] Shawn: “What?” Me: [Reads it.] Both of us: “Oh my god. That was awful.” Me: “He took her to Starbucks. Who does that?” Shawn: [Look over his glasses at me.] “Go get a coffee? On the first date. You know?” Me: [Stare.] Shawn: “It’s the first date. ‘Let’s get to know each other and see if the dating thing is plausible’ thing?” Me: “Who the fuck does that? Nobody does that. Take me out for gourmet dinner and diamonds.” Shawn: [Snort.] “People…

Comments closed

Arguments in the key of 2GP

“I don’t understand how you do this. ” “Do what?” “This! This kitchen thing you do.  There were EIGHT THOUSAND bowls in the sink and seventeen knives. What do you need EIGHT THOUSAND bowls for!” “Really? Really. Eight thousand? Whatever, Mister Flour ALL OVER the sink and the counter and some on the walls and ooooon the flooooors and socks by his desk and glasses on the desk and never cleans the surface of the–” “That has nothing to do with the fact–” “–cabinets or the cabinet doors or the fingerprints on the refrigerator or sweep and mop the floors…

Comments closed

A Good Year

Like most people, I’m busy celebrating with the better half and quite definitely “nicely relaxed.” this year, I am “nicely relaxed” (ie obliterated… so please excuse the typos) on a steady stream of Mooing Irish Pepsis (Bailey’s, coke and milk) and rum and cokes…

Comments closed