I’ve been owned and adopted by several generic domestic animals through out my illustrious career as a fat, geeky woman. Cats, dogs, birds and hamsters have all lived with me and have allowed me to continue living with them. What gets me is the blatant lack of common sense from other people who are also owned by pets. Here are some of the things that make me wonder how these people function in day to day life. The: My cat is vomiting up...

I can’t tell you why I love cats more than dogs. Dog lovers every where tend to rise up and point out how much more affectionate dogs are. How you can train them and you can’t (with ease) train a cat. How a dog might save you in a fire while your cat would probably wait until you are cooked to their liking and begin nibbling on you—if they haven’t already found some way to escape and leave you for dead. They might also like to...

10.) You aren’t a fan of loud noises. If you can’t stand the bird that merrily chirps outside your window at six in the morning, every morning—if the high pitched whistle of the tea kettle drives you nuts? You aren’t really for a cockatiel. While it’s true that they are smaller than cockatoo’s, conures and other parrots, a ‘tiel whistle when they are being particularity happy, unhappy, bored, playful (every other mood, etc)...

Three years ago, January 2005 we came home with two hamsters we thought were little boys. Admittedly, we did the incorrect thing by trusting whomever worked at the shop to look at the hamster and sex them. When we brought them home, we realized what we had were a girl and a boy. We separated them and hoped for the best. We named the female Mrs. Edwina Buttons and the male, Gnaws. Some people would say ‘unfortunately,’ I think,...